Know Thyself

I just started classes again for my summer term. I am currently taking 2 for summer A, Philosophy and some computer class. I have to take these to bring up my GPA because my scholarship is slipping away, it was hard to stay focused during freshmen year.

Fortunately, I'm starting more of my film classes instead of general education courses, so hopefully my interest in what I'm learning will keep me in my books. This computer class seems like it will be a pain, but it shouldn't be too difficult to handle. I've never taken a philosophy class, so I wasn't too sure what to expect when I walked in class yesterday. Not only is it at 10 in the morning, which is early for me, but I have it Monday through Thursday. I have horrible attention issues, so for me to have to endure the same class for about an hour and half four days in a row, this experience wasn't something I was looking forward to. Pathetic, I know, I know.

BUT- Philosophy is so cool! The professor is a very interesting person, he uses cross examination every time a student answers a question. He teaches us about wisdom and knowledge and how important it is to know yourself, something I feel I still need to work on.

And another point I have always thought about, separating your mind and your heart. When I was young, I had always tried to escape emotions completely, and I feel like that has backfired and made me cold and heartless. Not that I'm a bitch, because I am very friendly and nice to everyone, whether they are rude or not, and I try my best not to talk behind anyone's back and I avoid drama to the best of my ability.

But still, I have felt sometimes that I am incapable of love because of years of hiding emotions and controlling feelings. I've never been in a serious relationship, and could never see myself in one nor cared to be in one. Yet as I'm growing up, I guess I'm just going through some sort of identity crises. Who knows.

Anyway, that's just my rant, I've got nothing much more interesting going on. Tonight, my friend and I are supposed to discuss and elaborate on a very interesting film idea that we have created. We make a great team, since I am a writer and a director, and he is extremely talented in the arts. A great painter with a very open mind, who's work deals with dark and mysterious creations. This should be a fun project.

I work again tomorrow night, so hopefully I'll report back with interesting news!